Donna, The Grandma Jep of Berkley
Sunday, September 22, 2024
I stopped by the Neighborhood Shoppe for a bottle of wine on the way home. It’s a little store nearby, perfect to grab a cold drink or a freshly made pizza, find that needed spice, a banana or a bag of ice. It is the place to run into neighbors and share a smile. Several chairs out front sit under a “Loiter” sign, and a there’s a dog bowl of water signaling lingering is welcome. Everyone is welcome to drop by.
Ringing up my purchase, Donna dropped my wine, breaking it! She kindly replaced it with a higher priced wine, no extra charge. We laughed together. It reminded me about my cat Polly’s mishaps! I wrote about these adventures in a series of six books for children. Polly is the polydactyl, dilute calico kitten I adopted over four years ago. Integrating her into my clowder of four other cats inspired me to chronicle her antics. Our conversations are brief so of course Polly never came up before. I told Donna I want to give her a set.
At home, I pasted dedications in the cover of each volume. I wrote out a lovely card. I drove back to the store. I presented Donna the books in plastic covers, reminding her she’s making pizza and sandwiches, so the books are protected till clean-hands time. “Take them as a gift.” Of course, the card was nowhere to be seen!
Suddenly, my grandmother, Arlena Jeppesen, appeared in my mind. Grandma inspired me to write kids’ stories. Grandma wrote children’s stories that my dad read to me long ago: “Huffy, Duffy and Fluffy” about the Camp Robber birds that begged for scraps outside her kitchen window.
In a flash, I saw that Donna is like my Grandma Jep. I pulled her aside to explain the connection. Grandma was widowed in 1932 with 2 small children. She raised those children alone, with extended family on neighboring farms. She won the job as Postmistress of Dundee, Oregon, beating out a man with three children. My dad bragged that he sent letters home from his station in New Guinea in World War II addressed simply: “Mother, Dundee, Oregon.” She received every one of them.
Virlee is my 97 year old aunt and the last of her generation. A few years ago she told me family stories. She said my gift of listening to people came from her mother, Arlena Jeppesen. In Dundee, the Post Office was a gathering place for the community. Everyone checked mailboxes daily and lingered to chat. Grandma Jep was the listening ear and soft shoulder as Postmistress. She and the Post Office were the in-person, modern equivalent of social media. I grew up across the country from her, so I only knew outlines of her life. I assumed my gift of listening came from my mom, as I share her looks and personality. How cool that this skill came from both sides of the family!
I told Donna that she is like Grandma Jep. Donna smiles through everything, asking everyone how we are. When she catches me in odd moments when we are alone in the store together, my story of joy or woe slips out in a few words or sometimes in torrents. Donna, like Grandma Jep, listens with presence. The brief conversation is a glittering diamond moment of a rare human connection.
I gave Donna the books and thanked her for being a caring heart in the Berkley community. I told her that she boosts my spirit. I am grateful for her gentle, warmth. We hugged. She was near tears, and whispered, “Thank you. I am so filled with confusion and am never sure if I’m doing the right thing.” I hugged her tighter and said, “You ask caring questions and always listen. Few are the people I share with, but you are safe. You give kindness and acceptance. Berkley’s Neighborhood Shoppe is Dundee Post Office and you are Berkley’s ‘Grandma Jep’.”
My plan was to hand her the card at that moment. I chuckled, nothing goes as we plan, does it? It goes exactly as it goes. I took one more round trip home and back and delivered the card. It only took 3 trips! But isn’t that how life is? Wine bottles sometimes break. A caring shopkeeper sometimes touches us with a glance or a kind word. And the best of plans sometimes take 3 attempts to fulfill.