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Softies in Southfield

  • Posted on July 24, 2016 at 2:15 pm

Dear Christine,  I read your articles all the time and enjoy them.  They seem to be mostly about relationship issues but I have a question about parenting.  My partner and I have two children, a boy and a girl we had through a very good friend who was a surrogate for us.  The kids know her and know she is their biological mother.  That’s the background, here’s the question.  It’s about discipline.  The kids are at the pre-teen age and are starting to have typical issues of talking back and rebelling.  Our attempts at punishment generally include taking away their cell phones, grounding or not letting them do something they had planned.  The problem is, we are both too soft and usually give in.  I believe this is making the issues worse and the kids now can get away with just about anything.  So my question is, were we on the right track with the methods of punishment and how can we turn this around so the kids know we mean it and they might learn something?   Thanks, Softies in Southfield P.S. Although my partner and I do all the parenting, their biological mother is more like a close aunt and…

Abandoned in Adrian

  • Posted on June 27, 2016 at 5:13 pm

Dear Christine, I was with my partner for 7 years. We had a child together with her as the birth mother in our 2nd year together by a Donor we choose together.  The plan was to have another child with the same donor and me as the birth mother.  I’m devastated  that two years ago the love of my life cheated on me and left me. What has become even harder is the fact that now she won’t let me see our son. At first she agreed to shared parenting.  I haven’t seen my son in a year now and she doesn’t seem to care that it’s killing me. I’m hoping to convince her that allowing our son to continue to see me is in his best interest.  I don’t want him to think I abandoned him but I’m afraid by now he is forgetting me. Can you speak to the effects it may have on a child when one parent denies another visitation. Also, should I let go or continue to fight?  As much as it hurts, I want to do what’s best for my child. Thanks, Abandoned in Adrian PS my next question is, how can I ever…