You are currently browsing all posts tagged with 'depression'.

Dear Christine, Nevous in Novi

  • Posted on December 17, 2018 at 10:45 am

Dear Christine, Not sure what to do here. I have a good friend who has been driving drunk. She has come to my house barely able to walk yet she drove and has also shown up places where I knew she was too drunk to drive. After she shows up, we make sure she gets a ride or is sober before we let her go but how can we stop her when we are not there? I have told her the next time I catch her driving drunk, I am going to call the police and turn her in. I’m afraid she’s going to kill someone. I have no idea how many other times she’s driving drunk either. My knowledge of this makes me feel like I need to do something. What? Thanks! Dear Nervous, I checked two resources to answer this question: The Berkley Police Department, Deputy Chief Bob Narth and Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD) contact, Elvira Anderson. The police give the short answer that if you know or suspect someone is driving drunk, call the town police office where the person is driving and ask for the shift officer and give a description of the vehicle and…

Dear Christine, Dying to Not Know in Dundee

  • Posted on December 3, 2018 at 10:12 am

Dear Christine, Everything seems outwardly fun in my relationship I’ve been with my partner Marc for over 10 years but the other day I saw his phone and it was buzzing in there was a text message from a guy and it was definitely sexually explicit and it sounds like there something going on because I was being a little nosy I didn’t say anything I’m afraid to say anything because everything is going so great and I’m afraid if I say something it’ll be true I don’t want to break the status quo yet. I have to know I think. Dying to Not Know in Dundee Dear Dying, The Washington Post has a phrase at the top of its masthead that applies here:  “Democracy dies in darkness”.  And relationships die in darkness too.  So, you say there’s “outward fun” in your decade together with John, but I would appear that under that cover of fun is a different story. What kind of relationship do you really want?  One where he sneaks around and has sexting going on on the side?  And in which you are “being nosy”?  Right now, you have a Schroedinger’s Cat Paradox relationship.  As long as…

Dear Christine, Heart Broken in Holly

  • Posted on November 25, 2018 at 11:59 am

Dear Christine, I love her, but she assures me it’s over. She calls sometimes and makes plans with me and then cancels on short notice. I always get my hopes up and then I feel like shit when she does this. What should I do? What should I say to her? I do want to be friends with her but she makes that so hard, because everything has to be when she’s got time for me and then she cancels anyway. Heart Broken in Holly Dear Heart Broken, Oprah Winfrey once said “when people tell you who they are, listen to them.” If your ex still calls and makes plans and cancels abruptly, but insists it’s over, then believe the “it’s over” part of that. Words are easy, actions tell the truth. I hear that you are hurting and miss her, and that you feel like you are occasionally fit into her busy life, and hope keeps rising up, only to be dashed again. I imagine it’s not the description of the relationship you had with her, or that you would want with anyone. You can only make a choice for yourself here. Choose for it to be over. You…

Dear Christine, A Reader in Royal Oak

  • Posted on November 5, 2018 at 12:30 pm

Hi Dr. Christine, My partner and I have been together 19 years and overall we’re both happy together. Lately, though, I noticed she is asking me to pay the utility bills she always pays, saying she has no money. I pay a set, agreed upon amount for rent and living expenses, and we both do the chores and shopping. She does the upkeep and maintenance on the house, which is in her name only. She was burned in a prior relationship and she has always said she will not ever consider adding me to the deed. I’m confused because she has a good job and makes more money than I do, and I don’t know why she wouldn’t have money for the bills she’s used to paying regularly. I don’t think she’s gambling or using drugs, but I can’t figure out what is going on. Any suggestions? A Reader in Royal Oak. Dear Reader in Royal Oak, You raise several important issues. We gays and lesbians do not have access to the legal rights that married people get through their wedding license, such as joint home ownership or rights of survivorship to a house, should the owning partner die. We…

Dear Christine, Long Lost Love in Lathrup Village

  • Posted on October 7, 2018 at 5:45 pm

Dear Christine, I am 60 years old when I was in high school I can say the woman I dated and with the love of my life her parents caught us she was upset she was scared she married a man and left me and she went through three different husbands. Last month she contacted me on Facebook I don’t even know where she had been living. She called me; we met; she said she’s never gotten over me. Well the truth is I never got over her. Most of my friends knew about her I told him about the one love of my life from high school. But for Gods sake that’s high school, right?. But the truth is, when I saw her it felt like no time had passed at all even though it’s been so many years…all the love all the passion was still there I feel like we wasted so much time.  The only thing is both of us got married to men for a while.  We have children we have grandchildren.  But maybe now is our time. The problem is for the last 10 years I lived with a woman that I’ve basically settled for.…

Dear Christine, What if in Westland

  • Posted on September 24, 2018 at 10:20 am

Dear Christine, i’ve been bi for 6 years… but have always been too nervous to date a girl (or maybe just trying to hide) i’m right now dating a boy. i’ve been with him for a year and a half and for a while we were inseparable, planning to marry and be together forever. the works. but about 2 months ago he dumped me out of the blue. i went crazy and after about a month convinced him to give it another try. but he doesn’t love me anymore. things are very weird and definitely not the same. as this goes on, i’m losing interest. i’ve been thinking about finally coming out to the public and giving up on hiding or whatever it is i’ve been doing. here’s my big problem. i’m madly in crush with this girl i know who i met last year right in the midst of the good part of my relationship with my bf. i thought she was super gorgeous then, but now it’s consuming my every thought. i think about her constantly and it’s driving me crazy not knowing what to do. i kind of want to break up with my boy and pursue…

Dear Christine, Alone in my Own Universe

  • Posted on September 17, 2018 at 9:05 am

Dear Christine: I am a Transgendered Boy. Most of the time I feel very alone and depressed. What’s worse is that every other minute or so I seem to be changing my mind, whether I’m feeling male or female. My brain is buzzing from the constant conflict within me. Please Help me. Signed, Alone in my own Universe Dear Alone, First things first: Before you can start working on being transgendered you need to be screened for any underlying causes. That means getting a physical and mental evaluation. Get screened for depression and possibly Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). These diagnoses are quite common in transgendered folks. You might need proper medication to help you stop the buzzing in your brain. After being treated, your brain works again to help you make clear decisions to resolve your transgendered dilemma. Next, see a gender counselor. Find someone you trust to talk about all your feelings and needs. Remember you are NOT alone. Also check out Transgendered Forums and chat rooms to find someone you can talk to. Avoid talking with bitter people who are negative or discouraging. There are plenty of warm hearted people to chat with. Listen as much at least…

Dear Christine, Susannah in Southfield

  • Posted on September 10, 2018 at 10:02 am

Dear Christine, I can’t believe I’m writing for advice, but I think the time has come. I have been intimately involved with my lover for two years. She has been in a relationship with another woman for eight years. Needless to say, I am the other woman in her life. I am at the point where I want to end our relationship. My problem is I don’t know how. We started out as friends and have had so many fun times together I’m scared of losing that. I don’t want to hurt her, but I am mature and wise enough to know the entire situation seems to be a lost cause. My lover tells me I am trying to put a time limit on when we will be together, but after two years I feel I have the right to know what the future holds for me but there are no answers. Susannah in Southfield Dear Susannah, I think we’ve found a theme this summer: honesty and boundaries. You have put yourself in a relationship full of drama and lies, which may lead to a committed relationship, which would probably be full of trust issues, given how she’s cheating on…

Dear Christine, Curious in Canton

  • Posted on September 4, 2018 at 10:23 am

Dear Christine, I have enjoyed reading you articles but I feel a little out of place sending you a letter. It’s not the kind of thing I ever thought I would do but here goes. I have been in a good relationship for many years and I love my partner. I can’t think of anyone else I would rather be with, however lately I have been feeling very attracted to other men. In the past when another man flirted with me I would have never considered cheating. Lately, I’m not so sure. I don’t know why this is happening but the temptation is very strong. There is not one particular person I have in mind, I just want to go out and be with someone else. Boredom, mid-life crisis? Should I tell my partner I am having these feelings? I guess I’m just curious why I’m feeling this way when I never have before. Let me know what you think, Curious in Canton Hi Curious, I’m just wondering what your relationship has been like the past few years. Do you and your partner spend quality time with each other, focusing on each other without other distractions? Do you make time…

Dear Christine, Damaged Goods Downriver

  • Posted on July 15, 2018 at 7:47 pm

Dear Christine, I am a 28-year-old gay man. I came out when I was 18 and since then I’ve enjoyed a healthy, active dating life. I’ve always been comfortable with my sexuality. Three months ago, however, I tested HIV-positive and since then feel like I have to come out all over again. I haven’t been able to start dating yet because I’m afraid of how people will react when I tell them about my situation. And I don’t know what the rules are. What do I tell people? When do I tell people? And, if safe sex really is safe, do I have to tell them at all? And mostly I’m afraid (although I know it sounds crazy) that no one’s ever going to love me again. Damaged Goods Downriver Dear Damaged Goods: I hear you, coming out all over again, now as HIV + being just as confused and uncertain how to tell others as you were to tell people you were gay 10 years ago. Trust your instincts with people, and tell those who feels safe to you. There may be some rejection from some people, but if they were people you wanted to date or be friends…