You are currently browsing all posts tagged with 'bisexual'.

Dear Christine, A Hot Mess in Madison Heights

  • Posted on December 9, 2019 at 12:01 pm

Dear Christine, I’ve never done this before, I’m sorry if it’s a mess. I feel like I’m a burden to everyone. I try my hardest to do good and stay happy to not put the burden of me on anyone. But I mess things up and make mistakes constantly and all my hard work trying to stay positive about things just falls back down. I just had my baby almost 8 weeks ago and i love him he makes my world spin around. But I’m still not okay. I look at myself and I don’t like what I see. I hate my body. I am constantly in my phone because I try to distract myself while I’m around family and people. I have anxiety with most of everything. I overthink everything.  I have a great boyfriend who’s the father of my baby. But I don’t think he realizes or notices because I try and keep it to myself. We argue about the little things but we always end up fine at the end of the day. There are times I am generally happy and I love it and I forget about everything but it always comes creeping back. I’m just…

Dear Christine, Youch! in Ypsilanti

  • Posted on November 25, 2019 at 11:37 am

Dear Christine, My wife recently left me for a woman. It’s been traumatic to say the least. I knew something was up. Sex was low, she wasn’t climaxing and I could just feel her pulling away. I was an a_s for about a year, very negative about alot of things, not us, but father dying, money probs, newborn baby, bought a new house and she had 4 kids before we had ours. She said she always had “feelings” like she liked girls, but said she just ingored them hoping they would go away. Was married, got divorced and married me. Married 2yrs, together 6 for us. She said my meanness made her start looking for friendship and met someone at work and they just “clicked” Now she says she’s 100% gay and has no doubts and she’s the sub and only receives, apparently. She left and took the kids and got a house with said girl and I found and email from her “dom” girl saying she doesn’t want me buying OUR 2yr old ANYTHING for their new house and you’ve been riding around with that table in ur truck for 2 weeks instead of taking it back like I…

Dear Christine, Femme in Franklin

  • Posted on October 23, 2019 at 1:40 pm

Dear Christine, Do I Have Lesbian Repellant? I’m very femme. I couldn’t stop looking girly if I tried and I wouldn’t anyways.. I love my aesthetic of Curled Hair, Pin-Up looks. I have all kinds of “macho” skills but I appear to be a “Straight” gal to other Lesbians. I’ll admit I’m newly Out…. It’s always been nearly impossible to meet women. Even at an all Lesbian event women will ask if I “just broke up with my boyfriend”. Is there some kind of button I should wear? Is Femme really that offensive? I’ve heard that some Lesbians are into it. I would never change this about myself but I’d sure love to learn to Send out the Right Signals. Any suggestions..?? Dear Femme in Franklin Trust me… Femme is not offensive, nor is it a repellent. Speaking as a Butchly type that appreciates the Femme type. I have also seen and known Femmes that like other Femmes when it comes to *those* kinds of interactions. (the really good kind) Personally I also think that as women we are sometimes socialized to be more submissive and/or aren’t used to making the first move… and so oftentimes it can be a…

Dear Christine, Seeking Peace in Southgate

  • Posted on July 23, 2019 at 10:23 am

Dear Christine, My partner and I love each other very much. We have been together for 35 years. However, our skills of effective conflict resolution are very weak. Would you be able to help us get better at resolving conflicts.  Just recently I was feeling I’d have to leave her to get the peace I want to live with for my last  20 years.  I never told her I’m leaving before. I told her we should go to therapy to save our relationship.  What would you charge to help us to learn healthier ways to resolve conflicts? Signed, Seeking Peace in Southgate Dear Seeking, Thirty five years is a long time to live with and love each other with “weak conflict resolution skills”.  What have you done to resolve conflicts, misunderstandings and tension all these years?  I wonder if one of you has subsumed your identity/wants/needs under the other?  Or you both are tough characters who will keep a commitment, even if it kills you! If you read this blog, you know I encourage psychotherapy to develop healthy coping and conflict resolution skills, along with self-care.  If your partner refuses to join you in couple’s therapy where you both could…

Dear Christine, Puzzled in Pontiac

  • Posted on June 5, 2019 at 11:26 am

Dear Christine, I’ve got a problem with my wife. I’m straight, and am married to my wife and we have 3 beautiful children together. I love my wife very much and promised her that I would always love her and take care of her. I take my promises very seriously, especially because she has Borderline Personality Disorder. I have read everything I could find on line, and it is exactly her! I know no one else will take care of her and love her like me, but she says she’s fallen in love with someone else. Get this, it’s a woman! She says she’s not in love with me anymore, and since she’s met this woman, she won’t have sex with me any more. And she acts mean to me, comparing me to this woman, and she gets angry at me all the time, yelling. It’s just not fair! I keep telling her that no one, not even this woman, will ever love her or take care of her as I do. She says she’s going to move in with this woman, but she’s staying with me until tax time. I don’t really like that, but I don’t want to…

Dear Christine, Deserve Better in Bellville

  • Posted on April 15, 2019 at 8:24 am

Dear Christine, I was wondering what to do about this girl that I gave a year and a half of my life too. I met her 1 night at a club and she had a gf at the time but we still danced and it was awesome, it was 1 of those movie moments….you know like time stood still kind of thing. we actually started dating a few months after that, to give a small background she was telling me that her and her gf were no longer together, but they were. they really did break up and we did our thing and then i left for basic training (don’t ask, mistake)we were fine during that time but then things changed, she first slept w/ her ex b/c her ex started seeing someone and she wasn’t comfortable with losing control of her ex then she slept with her ex’s best friend who is a guy, she is currently with this guy, but they don’t see each but like every 6 wks. during all this she was still talking to me like nothing was wrong. her ex and i are really good friends now and she called me to inform me…

Dear Christine, Hurt in Huntington Woods

  • Posted on March 26, 2019 at 12:20 pm

Dear Christine, My X-partner and i have been living together for about 1 year. I moved into her home 3 months after we met.  She is the love of my life and i know that she loves me and she has stated that i am the love of her life as well. Four months ago things started to deteriorate between us. I suspected there was something going on between her and a guy friend from school and i confronted her about it. She flatly and madly denied any allegations. Our relationship was changing however…  it was very confusing because throughout all this doubt the love and chemistry was still very much there. She said she was having a hard time with school and so i gave her space and pep-talks when she needed them. Three weeks ago she said she wanted to end it. I was in complete shock. I week later she was kissing the guy from school. Two weeks later i came by to pick-up some of my things (a few days after valentines day) and i found used condoms in our apartment… i also found a love note from him face open on the floor. Hurt in…

Dear Christine, A Reader in Royal Oak

  • Posted on November 5, 2018 at 12:30 pm

Hi Dr. Christine, My partner and I have been together 19 years and overall we’re both happy together. Lately, though, I noticed she is asking me to pay the utility bills she always pays, saying she has no money. I pay a set, agreed upon amount for rent and living expenses, and we both do the chores and shopping. She does the upkeep and maintenance on the house, which is in her name only. She was burned in a prior relationship and she has always said she will not ever consider adding me to the deed. I’m confused because she has a good job and makes more money than I do, and I don’t know why she wouldn’t have money for the bills she’s used to paying regularly. I don’t think she’s gambling or using drugs, but I can’t figure out what is going on. Any suggestions? A Reader in Royal Oak. Dear Reader in Royal Oak, You raise several important issues. We gays and lesbians do not have access to the legal rights that married people get through their wedding license, such as joint home ownership or rights of survivorship to a house, should the owning partner die. We…

Dear Christine, Any Ideas in Ann Arbor?

  • Posted on October 30, 2018 at 10:13 am

Hello Dr. Cantrell, I have a question that I am sure will lead to the answer that therapy is a great idea. For three years, we (my partner and I) have discussed this over and over again. Her lack of action is leading me to asking you about this. My partner and I have been together for 8.5 years and we love each other. I can count the number of times we have been intimate on one hand and there are no health reasons for it. I have given up the hope that we will be intimate after discussing a number of alternatives or go to therapy. I am very sad as she emphatically denies there being any reason for her lack of interest in intimacy. Being celibate just makes her happy. It drives me nuts, but she is content. I don’t want to be with anyone else and she says being intimate with others makes her very unhappy. It is not that this is a relationship breaker. I refuse to leave her over something that seems so adolescent but it won’t stop bugging me. I just feel more like a close room mate than anything else and we should…

Dear Christine, Long Lost Love in Lathrup Village

  • Posted on October 7, 2018 at 5:45 pm

Dear Christine, I am 60 years old when I was in high school I can say the woman I dated and with the love of my life her parents caught us she was upset she was scared she married a man and left me and she went through three different husbands. Last month she contacted me on Facebook I don’t even know where she had been living. She called me; we met; she said she’s never gotten over me. Well the truth is I never got over her. Most of my friends knew about her I told him about the one love of my life from high school. But for Gods sake that’s high school, right?. But the truth is, when I saw her it felt like no time had passed at all even though it’s been so many years…all the love all the passion was still there I feel like we wasted so much time.  The only thing is both of us got married to men for a while.  We have children we have grandchildren.  But maybe now is our time. The problem is for the last 10 years I lived with a woman that I’ve basically settled for.…